Mortal Kombat: Character Sexuality (100% speculative and unfounded in any fact whatsoever).
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posted05/19/2011 01:44 AM (UTC)by
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ZeroSymbolic7188
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04/09/2011 07:33 PM (UTC)
This is one of my favorite things to do lol. I had a pretty good going at Zangief of Street Fighter. Now Mortal Kombat goes under the GAYDAR:

Baraka - Well, almost all the other Tarkaton's are men, Mileena being a rare exception. Baraka commands that army so its not like he has time to go out on a date or cruise chicks in Edenia, or maybe he just pays prostitutes. VERDICT: Undecided, but certainty questionable.

Cyrax - I think there are females in the Lin Kuie, we know that for sure there were females in the Mugai Ryu, and the Lin Kuie already had frost. Cyrax and Sektor certaintly didnt have any love for each other, and now Cyrax is a robot so he doesnt need sex. VERDICT: Straight Robot.

Ermac - Ermac is a manifestation of souls, I dont think he has sexual urges. VERDICT: Ermac doesnt have sex.

Jade - Jade is a curious case. She has amazonian features and is rumored to be Brazilian. Brazil has a disporpotionate transexual culture. VERDICT: I think Jade is a ladyboy.

Jax - Jax has straight up alpha male characteristics, and a clear dedication to Sonya. VERDICT: Definitely Straight.

Johnny Cage-Also has a love for Sonya. VERDICT: Straight.

Kabal- Kabal brought Kira into the Black Dragon for a reason. VERDICT:Straight.

Kano- Hmm full beard, furry chest, Biker boots. Kano at first seems to have some bearish things happening. However he is also a psychopath and I think he gets some sick sexual fix out of tormenting Sonya. VERDICT: Straight.

Kitana-Obvious love affair with Liu Kang. VERDICT: Straight.

Kratos-Maybe in God of War he was something else, but hes gay in Mortal Kombat. VERDICT: Situationally gay.

Kung Lao-I think that Kung Lao is very close to Liu Kang and shows no interest in Kitana or Sonya at all. VERDICT: Gay.

Liu Kang-Like I just said, I think Kung Lao and Liu are very very close, and I think that Liu genuinely likes Kitana as well. VERDICT: Bisexual

Mileena-Mileena is just full of raw sexual energy. VERDICT:Nymphomaniac.

Nightwolf-He's a shaman, and most religious figures take a vow of abstinence. VERDICT: Pure.

Noob Saibot- If I follow the insanity that is the storyline. Noob Saibot is a ghost. VERDICT: Ghost.

Quan Chi-All his connections in the game are men, and Scorpion is his personal bitch. VERDICT: Gay

Raiden -He shows more feeling for Liu Kang than anyone else, and he is a GOD he could choose any mate he wanted. VERDICT: Gay

Reptile- When your not a human, not an animal, and cant talk your options are pretty limited. VERDICT: Virgin

Scorpion - Quan Chi's Bitch. VERDICT: Gay

Sektor- See Cyrax. VERDICT: Straight

Shang Tsung - Binded his soul to Shao Kahn. VERDICT: Gay

Sheeva - Sheeva's only options are Goro and Kintaro. VERDICT: Straight.

Sindel - Sindel mothered Kitana. I dont think it was an adoption scenario, so there must have been a man involved. VERDICT: Straight.

Smoke - The hair says it all. "Where there's smoke there is FLAMING. VERDICT: Very Gay

Sonya - Sonya has both Jax and Johnny Cage wanting some action yet shows no interest in either of them, and is constantly trying to avenge her "partenor". VERDICT: Lesbian

Stryker - Officer Nasty himself. Reminds me a lot of Robert Halford and we all know how that turned out. VERDICT: Gay

Sub-Zero - Sub Zero freezes anything he touches. VERDICT: Virgin

Shao Kahn - It was well established that no ass is safe from Kahns Wrath. VERDICT: Kahn can have sex with a man, but its not because he is gay, its because he is bored with all the women.

========================================================
This thread is not to be taken seriously in the least. Just have fun with it and stay cool. glasses
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Sykyl
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05/18/2011 05:49 AM (UTC)
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this thread...officially gave me cancer.
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ZeroSymbolic7188
05/18/2011 05:53 AM (UTC)
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Sykyl Wrote:
this thread...officially gave me cancer.


Cool Story Mark.
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McHotcakes
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"Never Stay Down"- Steve Rogers

05/18/2011 05:57 AM (UTC)
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Quan Chi is gay? Don't forget his three sex slaves- I mean assassins he has in mythologies. Probably bi. He is too powerful to be limited to one sex.
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J-spit
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Twilight Muthafuckin' Sparkle

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05/18/2011 05:58 AM (UTC)
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Sykyl Wrote:
this thread...officially gave me cancer.


Sykyl Cell perhaps?
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ZeroSymbolic7188
05/18/2011 06:00 AM (UTC)
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McHotcakes Wrote:
Quan Chi is gay? Don't forget his three sex slaves- I mean assassins he has in mythologies. Probably bi. He is too powerful to be limited to one sex.


Nobody played Mythologies. lol
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Insider2000
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Keep dunking your Kenshi breadsticks into your Skarlet sauce, people! The main course isn't coming for a while, and you never know when it's going to be disappointing.

05/18/2011 06:00 AM (UTC)
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......What have I done?

Now I know how Raiden feels.
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Th3Kinky1
05/18/2011 06:02 AM (UTC)
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HAHAHAHA! I agree with every situation you have posted.
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McHotcakes
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"Never Stay Down"- Steve Rogers

05/18/2011 06:14 AM (UTC)
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ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
McHotcakes Wrote:
Quan Chi is gay? Don't forget his three sex slaves- I mean assassins he has in mythologies. Probably bi. He is too powerful to be limited to one sex.


Nobody played Mythologies. lol


(sniff sniff) I did sad
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ZeroSymbolic7188
05/18/2011 06:18 AM (UTC)
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McHotcakes Wrote:
ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
McHotcakes Wrote:
Quan Chi is gay? Don't forget his three sex slaves- I mean assassins he has in mythologies. Probably bi. He is too powerful to be limited to one sex.


Nobody played Mythologies. lol


(sniff sniff) I did sad

Your the only one. Friendship is Magic.
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T-rex
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05/18/2011 06:20 AM (UTC)
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GuardiaXIV
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sig by prodigy004

05/18/2011 06:31 AM (UTC)
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Sheesh for Earthrealm's sake long hair doesn't mean gay. Wasn't there so many goddamn discussions about Smoke's hair already?

Also lol Scorpion is forever Quan Chi's top ho.
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Trini_Bwoi
05/18/2011 06:37 AM (UTC)
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Ermac:
Within him contains the souls of people of many different types sexualities. Everything from heterosexuals to transsexuals to bisexuals to asexuals to homosexuals to beastsexuals to pansexuals...
CONCLUSION: Ermac is a very confused individual poor him.

Smoke:
The hair. The run. The Breaker. The versus pose.
CONCLUSION: Homosexual
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LemyAddum
05/18/2011 06:47 AM (UTC)
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Fucking hell
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GREGalicious
05/18/2011 07:23 AM (UTC)
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!?!...too much time on ur hands...?!?
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Garlador
05/18/2011 07:42 AM (UTC)
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I'm even more upset that Smoke didn't get automated now.

He could have been a Gay Robot!
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(Erik)
05/18/2011 07:48 AM (UTC)
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ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Jade - Jade is a curious case. She has amazonian features and is rumored to be Brazilian. Brazil has a disporpotionate transexual culture. VERDICT: I think Jade is a ladyboy.


What does this mean? Are you saying she is transgendered? Because no.

ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Johnny Cage-Also has a love for Sonya. VERDICT: Straight.


Celebrities fuck and get fucked to be at the top. And vain people like him are notoriously shagging the same gender. I’d say he’s bisexual.

ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Kabal- Kabal brought Kira into the Black Dragon for a reason. VERDICT:Straight.


But in this reality of MK2011? He didn’t. Maybe he’ll recruit Kobra, for a reason. Homo.

ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Kratos-Maybe in God of War he was something else, but hes gay in Mortal Kombat. VERDICT: Situationally gay.


What did he do to be situationally gay in MK2011?

ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Kung Lao-I think that Kung Lao is very close to Liu Kang and shows no interest in Kitana or Sonya at all. VERDICT: Gay.

Liu Kang-Like I just said, I think Kung Lao and Liu are very very close, and I think that Liu genuinely likes Kitana as well. VERDICT: Bisexual


I disagree. Sometimes two male friends can just be straight. Heterosexuals.

ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Quan Chi-All his connections in the game are men, and Scorpion is his personal bitch. VERDICT: Gay

Raiden -He shows more feeling for Liu Kang than anyone else, and he is a GOD he could choose any mate he wanted. VERDICT: Gay


Quan Chi associates with men because they’re more powerful than women. Raiden chose the best chance Earthrealm had against the forces of evil, which is a man. Duh. Because men are powerful. These guys are in it to win it. Not fuck. Heterosexuals.

ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Sheeva - Sheeva's only options are Goro and Kintaro. VERDICT: Straight.


She has an entire race of Shokan to choose from. If I’ve ever seen a lesbian, Sheeva fits that bill.

ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Sindel - Sindel mothered Kitana. I dont think it was an adoption scenario, so there must have been a man involved. VERDICT: Straight.


So she could have been raped, use invitro, or even used magic. But I’d say she had sex naturally with the king. Unless the king was a homosexual who wanted nothing to do with her.

ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Sonya - Sonya has both Jax and Johnny Cage wanting some action yet shows no interest in either of them, and is constantly trying to avenge her "partenor". VERDICT: Lesbian


This is so funny! But Sonya strikes me as the kind of lesbian who might get drunk and have sex with men. Or make men her bitch. Dominatrix? Bisexual.

ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Stryker - Officer Nasty himself. Reminds me a lot of Robert Halford and we all know how that turned out. VERDICT: Gay


I’ve seen you homosexuals drool over Stryker endlessly. I think this is a case of “fantasy gay” where your inner desires hope he’ll have sex with you, but deep down you know better. Heterosexual.
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RazorsEdge701
05/18/2011 08:03 AM (UTC)
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I was honestly more offended by "Nobody played Mythologies" than by how unfunny the sexuality jokes in the first post are.
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Insider2000
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Keep dunking your Kenshi breadsticks into your Skarlet sauce, people! The main course isn't coming for a while, and you never know when it's going to be disappointing.

05/18/2011 08:38 AM (UTC)
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(Erik) Wrote:
ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:

I’ve seen you homosexuals drool over Stryker endlessly. I think this is a case of “fantasy gay” where your inner desires hope he’ll have sex with you, but deep down you know better. Heterosexual.



I'm one of those who drool over Stryker.

I think he's straight from what I've seen of him. Granted, there's always wishful thinking, but....it's not like he exists, unfortunately.

RazorsEdge701 Wrote:
I was honestly more offended by "Nobody played Mythologies" than by how unfunny the sexuality jokes in the first post are.


This. Just....this.

Seriously, Mythologies was awesome.
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T-rex
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05/18/2011 08:57 AM (UTC)
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Insider2000 Wrote:

RazorsEdge701 Wrote:
I was honestly more offended by "Nobody played Mythologies" than by how unfunny the sexuality jokes in the first post are.


This. Just....this.

Seriously, Mythologies was awesome.

Shit's fucking hard as hell,though.

I gotta actually play it through to the end one of these days.
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Wulfgart
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"Ask not the Eldar a question, for they will give you three answers, all of which are true and terrifying to know."

05/18/2011 09:53 AM (UTC)
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Right. You've hit the bottom, MKO.
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sss133
05/18/2011 10:06 AM (UTC)
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Garlador Wrote:
I'm even more upset that Smoke didn't get automated now.

He could have been a Gay Robot!

'I believe the term is Gaybot but its a silent t. (taken straight from south park and lesbos)
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SynjoDeonecros
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"Is it so important that you win one last argument with him?" "No, it is not, but it is true that I will miss the arguments; they were, finally, all that we had."

05/18/2011 01:10 PM (UTC)
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ZeroSymbolic7188 Wrote:
Sheeva - Sheeva's only options are Goro and Kintaro. VERDICT: Straight.



Um, no; Sheeva is a slut who would screw anything, if her victory poses and fatalities are to be believed. Besides, Goro and Kintaro have a well-established man crush feud going on between them, with Kintaro's jealousy of Goro's fame and his WWE-style showmanship flaunting, and Goro getting pissy whenever you beat Kintaro in his lair.

Verdict: Sheeva = Too many hands to keep to one gender.
Goro and Kintaro: Enjoy wrestling together at the YMCA to the music of the Village People.
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cagedrage
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05/18/2011 01:39 PM (UTC)
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smoke: the run, the amazing hair, SUB-ZEROOOO- gay and flamboyant

scorpion: he had a wife and son- straight

shao kahn: he can get whatever ass he wants, you will get some- doesn't matter

liu kang: he had a thing with kitana- straight

ermac: he's alot of people, he's alot of things- confused

sindel: kid, husband- straight

nightwolf: for some reason he gives off a gay vibe- need more evidence

kung lao: he seems pretty close to liu- gay

sonya: she seems a little butch but has some kind of interest in johnny- straight

johnny: he chases sonya through the entire game- straight
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Midey
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05/18/2011 01:42 PM (UTC)
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I cannot agree with your opinion about Scorpion - he had a wife and son.
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