Jokes from Spongebob that are still funny
Jokes from Spongebob that are still funny
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posted09/10/2010 10:46 PM (UTC)by

Go ahead and share any that are off the top of your head.
-Nasty Patty Episode
Mr. Krabs: You can't tell anybody about this, it'll be the end of you, it'll be the end of me, but worst of all... it'll be the end of me.
-Missing Identity Episode
Spongebob: Have you forgotten what we're looking for?! Let me give you a hint, two words. First word: My, second word: Nametag!"
Patrick: .....Coul I have another hint?
-Secret Box episode
Patrick: Nobody must know the secret of the secret box, not even....... Squidward's house.
-Hash Slinging Slasher Episode
Squidward: But wait, if that was you on the phone and you on the bus.... then who was flickering the lights?
(Cuts to Nosferatu flipping the light switch)
All: Nosferatu!
-Survival of the Idiots episode
Sandy: WHICH ONE OF YOU IS THE REAL DIRTY DAN
Patrick: uuum........... I am.
(Sandy Bitch slaps Patrick across the dome.)
-Nasty Patty Episode
Mr. Krabs: You can't tell anybody about this, it'll be the end of you, it'll be the end of me, but worst of all... it'll be the end of me.
-Missing Identity Episode
Spongebob: Have you forgotten what we're looking for?! Let me give you a hint, two words. First word: My, second word: Nametag!"
Patrick: .....Coul I have another hint?
-Secret Box episode
Patrick: Nobody must know the secret of the secret box, not even....... Squidward's house.
-Hash Slinging Slasher Episode
Squidward: But wait, if that was you on the phone and you on the bus.... then who was flickering the lights?
(Cuts to Nosferatu flipping the light switch)
All: Nosferatu!
-Survival of the Idiots episode
Sandy: WHICH ONE OF YOU IS THE REAL DIRTY DAN
Patrick: uuum........... I am.
(Sandy Bitch slaps Patrick across the dome.)
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Lets see..
Spongebob: HELP HELP! He's gonna kick my butt.
*Camera cuts to old guy
Townspeople: So you like kicking butts do you? Well we'll show you old man.
Old guy: Well Hello young people nice day today.
That entire episode is halarious.
Spongebob: HELP HELP! He's gonna kick my butt.
*Camera cuts to old guy
Townspeople: So you like kicking butts do you? Well we'll show you old man.
Old guy: Well Hello young people nice day today.
That entire episode is halarious.
About Me

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Spongebob: (after finding a stolen Krabby Patty in Plankton's pocket) How can you not see it!
Plankton: *sobbing*Alright, it's a Krabby Patty!
Spongebob: But we sang the fun song!
Patrick: You have set to M for mini, when it should be set to W for Wumbo!
Plankton: *sobbing*Alright, it's a Krabby Patty!
Spongebob: But we sang the fun song!
Patrick: You have set to M for mini, when it should be set to W for Wumbo!


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"Is this the Krusty Crab?"
"NO,THIS IS PATRICK!"
"WE'RE NOT CAVEMEN SPONGEBOB!!!!!
We have technology..."
"NO,THIS IS PATRICK!"
"WE'RE NOT CAVEMEN SPONGEBOB!!!!!
We have technology..."
"Don't shoot!!... Okay shoot but don't take my money!" - Mr. Krabs
"Why does every eleven seconds of my life have to be fill with misery?! Why!?" - Squidward
*Plankton ordering 1,000 Patties* "Okay... Thanks mister... Peter Lankton..." - Mr. Krabs
*Patrick getting a job at the Krusty Krab* "That's great... When I started working here I had to pay mr. Krab $100 an hour!"(or I forgot the amount) - Spongebob
"Ice! Ice! Is that what you want?!? You want ice?!... Ice is just a myth!!" - Mr. Krabs
"Why does every eleven seconds of my life have to be fill with misery?! Why!?" - Squidward
*Plankton ordering 1,000 Patties* "Okay... Thanks mister... Peter Lankton..." - Mr. Krabs
*Patrick getting a job at the Krusty Krab* "That's great... When I started working here I had to pay mr. Krab $100 an hour!"(or I forgot the amount) - Spongebob
"Ice! Ice! Is that what you want?!? You want ice?!... Ice is just a myth!!" - Mr. Krabs
Squidward: And... THE WALLS WILL OOZE GREEN SLIME?! Oh wait, they always do that."
---
Ding, sparkle sparkle
---
Plankton: Good everyone I'l remember you all in therapy!
---
Guy: Sorry but chocolate contains sugar and sugar turns to bubbling fat, here's me when I was 13. You can keep that for 5 bucks...
Patrick: I'll take 20
---
Ding, sparkle sparkle
---
Plankton: Good everyone I'l remember you all in therapy!
---
Guy: Sorry but chocolate contains sugar and sugar turns to bubbling fat, here's me when I was 13. You can keep that for 5 bucks...
Patrick: I'll take 20

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-Spongebob: But they're good for you!
-Squidward: C'mon, that thing is a heart attack on a bun!
-Spongebob: No, I mean *Heaven appears* good for your soul!
-Squidward: Oh please, I have no soul! *Hell appears in background. Squidward's eyes widen*
-Spongebob: And we can talk tough! "This town ain't big enough fer the two of us!"
-Patrick: Ooh! Let me try....."Heeeeeyyy, punk." Haha!
*Spongebob and Sandy go out to fight the Alaskin Bull Worm*
-Krabs: Don't worry! We have full faith in ya! *Looks to Patrick* What was your idea, again?
*Cut to the townspeople outside Bikini Bottom*
-Patrick: PUSH!
-Spongebob: Hello...Pile of tin cans? *puts on Karate gloves* Oh-ho, Sandy, that is your worst disguise yet!
-Sandy: *Appearing behind him* No it ain't Spongbob! This is! *Pulls out a squirrel mask*
-Squidward: C'mon, that thing is a heart attack on a bun!
-Spongebob: No, I mean *Heaven appears* good for your soul!
-Squidward: Oh please, I have no soul! *Hell appears in background. Squidward's eyes widen*
-Spongebob: And we can talk tough! "This town ain't big enough fer the two of us!"
-Patrick: Ooh! Let me try....."Heeeeeyyy, punk." Haha!
*Spongebob and Sandy go out to fight the Alaskin Bull Worm*
-Krabs: Don't worry! We have full faith in ya! *Looks to Patrick* What was your idea, again?
*Cut to the townspeople outside Bikini Bottom*
-Patrick: PUSH!
-Spongebob: Hello...Pile of tin cans? *puts on Karate gloves* Oh-ho, Sandy, that is your worst disguise yet!
-Sandy: *Appearing behind him* No it ain't Spongbob! This is! *Pulls out a squirrel mask*
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Vash_15 Wrote:
Squidward: And... THE WALLS WILL OOZE GREEN SLIME?! Oh wait, they always do that."
---
Ding, sparkle sparkle
---
Plankton: Good everyone I'l remember you all in therapy!
---
Guy: Sorry but chocolate contains sugar and sugar turns to bubbling fat, here's me when I was 13. You can keep that for 5 bucks...
Patrick: I'll take 20
Squidward: And... THE WALLS WILL OOZE GREEN SLIME?! Oh wait, they always do that."
---
Ding, sparkle sparkle
---
Plankton: Good everyone I'l remember you all in therapy!
---
Guy: Sorry but chocolate contains sugar and sugar turns to bubbling fat, here's me when I was 13. You can keep that for 5 bucks...
Patrick: I'll take 20
That reminds me in that same episode
Spongebob: Hello sir would you like to buy some chocolate.
Crazy Guy: Chocolate? CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE!!!!

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"What can we do to sell these bars? How did that guy get us to buy those candy bar bags?"
"Ummm...he said we were 'mediocre'?"
"That's it! He made us feel special!"
"I'll give him a week." "I'll give him 11 minutes."
"Ummm...he said we were 'mediocre'?"
"That's it! He made us feel special!"
"I'll give him a week." "I'll give him 11 minutes."


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-Hooky episode
Patrick: "Spongebob, are you gonna listen to a big dummy, or at you gonna listen to me?"
-Mr. Krabs' dime
Spongebob: You're a football player!
Squidward: no....
Spongebob: You're a spaceman!
SquidwardL no...
Spongebob: ........A football playing king in space!
-Patrick's parents
Patrick: "But don't geniuses live in a lamp?"
Patrick: "Spongebob, are you gonna listen to a big dummy, or at you gonna listen to me?"
-Mr. Krabs' dime
Spongebob: You're a football player!
Squidward: no....
Spongebob: You're a spaceman!
SquidwardL no...
Spongebob: ........A football playing king in space!
-Patrick's parents
Patrick: "But don't geniuses live in a lamp?"

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Spongebob: But Sandy!!! How can you be pregnant! You said you had a sponge in your.... Ohhhhhh! You meant me!

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From the episode where Squidward tries to sell his house and tells Spongebob its Opposite Day..
"He's Squidward! Your Squidward! I'm Squidward is there any other Squidward's I should know about!?" Gary as Squidward "MEEEeeeeOOOW" classic
"He's Squidward! Your Squidward! I'm Squidward is there any other Squidward's I should know about!?" Gary as Squidward "MEEEeeeeOOOW" classic
I like this thread a lot...
I got the pieces!
I got the air!
I didn't want to tell you this in front of Patrick but that hat makes you look like a girl.
Am I a pretty girl?
You're a... beautiful.
The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma
Spongebob, are you trying to put me in the nuthouse?
Nope, just into this hole.
I got the pieces!
I got the air!
I didn't want to tell you this in front of Patrick but that hat makes you look like a girl.
Am I a pretty girl?
You're a... beautiful.
The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma
Spongebob, are you trying to put me in the nuthouse?
Nope, just into this hole.

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It's too bad the show has lost its spark, just like the Simpsons. All the new episodes are so lame.

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I feel like a kid reading all this
. But...
In reference to Squidward never trying the burger. Squidward to spongebob, "Does this look like i'm unsure to you?
Spongebob: "No"
In reference to Squidward never trying the burger. Squidward to spongebob, "Does this look like i'm unsure to you?

Spongebob: "No"


About Me
People say I'm strange, but that's ok because their brain smells like bacon. [XBL - DOKTOR ALUCARD]
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I can't anything do right since because pickles.


About Me
GT: Dimitri1033
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the one where spongebob and patrick steal a balloon
patrick: YOU ATE MY CANDY BAR!!! AND NOW I'M GONNA STARVE!
cuts to patricks big ass belly
lol, good stuff, good stuff
patrick: YOU ATE MY CANDY BAR!!! AND NOW I'M GONNA STARVE!
cuts to patricks big ass belly
lol, good stuff, good stuff
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